Pure Magic

“Gratitude is the great multiplier. Whatever you are grateful and thankful for multiplies.” 

I’ve been reading The Magic by Rhonda Byrne this past week, a gift from my wife, Katie.

The book guides readers through a 28-day practice centered on thankfulness and gratitude. The idea is to become more aware of the good already present in your life and to give it your attention. As I’ve worked through it, I’ve become more aware of how quickly those moments can disappear when we’re already looking ahead to the next problem.

I know parenting three children has a way of training the brain like that. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I can convince myself that one of them is always on the verge of a meltdown.

Usually, they’re not.

Everything. 
Is. 
Okay.

That’s where a lot of anxiety comes from. Anticipating a fire that may need to be put out or assuming a storm is already brewing. I can find myself scanning for what might go wrong before anything actually has.

While there have certainly been seasons when I’ve had to put out those fires or hold the umbrella while the rain came sideways, there have also been moments when I loosened my grip and trusted the people around me. Those moments have brought peace.

This carried into the founders’ roundtable at The Nexus, where I coached a conversation about confidence when approaching someone new. We talked about leading with a story about a problem you’ve solved, instead of starting with a description of what you do.

Stories help people imagine what is possible. They also remind us of what has already gone right. That feels connected to gratitude.

When we spend all our time talking about what we do not love, frustration begins to take up more space. The mind gets used to rehearsing difficulty. This is true in the conversations we have with ourselves, too.

We all have an internal narration running throughout the day. Sometimes it’s focused on what’s next to fix, what hasn’t happened yet, or what could go wrong. The longer we rehearse those stories, the easier they become to believe.

One of the simplest ideas I took from The Magic was to intentionally tell a different story.

Talk about the appointment that went well. Remember the conversation that encouraged you. Be thankful for your health. Speak confidently about the future you’re working toward.

That’s the part of manifesting that resonates with me. Not pretending life is perfect. Simply choosing, on purpose, what receives the most attention.

What we repeatedly notice begins to shape how we experience our lives.

I’ve had a lot to notice lately.

My team at JHD has been stepping up around me. The people at The Nexus continue to show up for one another in meaningful ways. The volunteers at Night Market keep showing up because they believe in what we’re building together.

They’ve earned the right to carry some of the weight. Because of them, I can step away and be fully present for moments that matter, including celebrating Katie’s birthday this week.

There’s something fitting about spending her birthday reading a book she gave me about gratitude. She has a way of seeing what I need before I do. While I’m scanning the horizon for storms that mostly don’t arrive, she keeps our family steady. She reminds me, without ever saying it, to notice what’s already good.

I’m a lucky guy.

I’ve caught myself using the phrase “pure magic” a lot lately.

Right now, I’m just trying to notice more of it.