For the first column of the new year, instead of looking backwards for an idea, I’m looking forward, and instead of writing about me, this story is really about you…well, mostly. Now how can I possibly write such a story if we’ve never met? Well, Dear Reader, we actually have. Keep reading, and you soon will discover, like I have, there are common threads woven into the fabric of us all. If only is one of those threads.
In the years to come, you might start looking back over your life thinking, If only I could change a few things from my past, life would be so much better. Don’t. This is an exercise in futility. Take it from one who has wasted countless hours doing this over five decades – only to come up with two undeniable conclusions. The past can’t be changed, but the future can be. And it’s your future that this story is really about…well, mostly.
Some folks who want to make a change in their lives find themselves fearful to do so. That fear keeps them paralyzed. Others just need a little nudge. Well, here you go – consider this your nudge. You’re never too old to do what you want to do or become what you’re really meant to be.
Change is frightening.
I’d like to be able to say that the older you get, the less frightening change becomes, but that wouldn’t be true. You’ve got bills to pay, kids to take care of, and a job that takes a lot of focus, most of your time, and almost all your energy. Adulting is hard and leaves very little for anything else – like change. Luckily, a little time is all you really need.
A crack.
Have you ever watched a bird hatch from its egg? Emerging from inside the protective life of the shell to the outside is a real struggle. It starts off with a small crack, then the crack widens and eventually a piece of the shell falls away and a new life starts to emerge.
The reality.
We all live inside some form of a protective shell – some we’ve built to keep the world out and some to keep ourselves in. But the most damaging shells have been placed around us by others, formed by phrases like: You can’t do that. You don’t have a degree. You’re not like your brother or sister. These are perhaps the hardest shells to crack and escape from, especially if they have been placed around you by a loved one. After years of trying, I broke through the shells placed upon me and made changes. I know it can be done. You can do it also.
Now this story is about me.
Back in 11th grade, I received a D- in my English class. Ms. Newsome said I hadn’t learned anything about the English language and thought I never would. It took over twenty-five years, but I finally broke out of that shell she wrapped me in, with my first printed story. This marks the start of the twenty-fourth year of this column.
During those seven magical years growing up back on that old familiar street not so far away called Flamingo, I wanted to paint pictures like my mom. Frightened of failure, I never tried…until recently. A year and a half ago, I picked up a paint brush for the very first time to chase that childhood dream. I now understand the joy Mom received from being an artist, and I’m proud to be able to pass down the skills I’ve learned to our granddaughters along with something else as well – advice. It’s natural to be afraid of doing something you’ve never done before, but don’t let being frightened of failure keep you from doing it.
Don’t let age stop you from changing.
Finally, if I were able to turn back the clock and start life all over again, I would choose to be a teacher. Alas, such a thing is impossible. Still, at age sixty-six, I’ve made a big change. At the beginning of this school year, I became a kindergarten paraprofessional and look forward to helping in the classroom (plus helping the littles break out of their shells) for the next ten years…or even longer.
Whether all at once or starting with just a little crack pecked at over time, change is always possible – no matter how late in life. I hope this story has given you that little push needed to climb out of your shell. It’s never too late to do what you always wanted to do or become what you were always meant to be.
See? I told you this story was really all about you…well, almost.
