The TSA failed a recent Homeland Security audit by not detecting 80 percent of “test weapons” smuggled through Airport Security checkpoints. They beat their own 2015 record of a 95 percent flunk rate.
TSA screeners earn $20-plus per hour ($40,000-plus a year), plus all of the taxpayer funded gimme government benefits.
It takes many to cover one screening station. You will always find several yucking it up. There are 44,000 TSA screeners.
Walmart greeters have a higher success rate at detecting “five-finger discount” perps trying to sneak out of the store with their booty.
WalMart’s shortage is less than 1 percent.
Greeters earn $9 an hour, $18,000 a year.
It takes just one greeter to cover the exits of a store the size of several football fields.
The good news is that TSA did detect most of the nuns trying to smuggle through small bottles of holy water, nabbed 100 percent of the wheelchair-bound centenarians sitting on tubes of Fixodent Dental Adhesive and ferreted out all the soaked pampers.
I feel so much safer now. “What, me worry?”
I must give credit where credit is due: TSA did find and confiscate my 4-ounce container of peanut-butter-gluten-flavored dog food in the far recesses of my backpack. Had it opened onboard it could have caused pandemonium and nauseated many.
Do not fear: To the rescue is Rep. Bill Keating (D-MA); he is on it.
Keating blames the TSA high flunk rate on the lack of technology caused by President Trump spending too much on the “Wall.”
You can’t make this stuff up!
Is it time to recruit some disgruntled Walmart greeters and privatize the TSA?
Michael Velsmid
Peachtree City, Ga.
