It's a conspiracy

against the American people, I tell you, a conspiracy plain and simple

to keep us all fat! It's happening in some grocery stores around this

state - right in front of the most helpless of us - our children. Yes,

sir. It's true, and most of us are going about our daily lives, oblivious

to the insidious goings-on around us.

Well, not me.

I'm gonna do something about it.

What am I talking

about? What has me pulling out my hair this week? (Okay, I know I don't

have much hair left, but this is worthy of hair pulling.) It's none other

than artery-clogging-fat-filled-high cholesterol foods! Somebody out there

wants to keep us all fat.

You say you

don't believe me? Just read on, faithful reader, because I have proof.

Say you're

a mom and you just had a baby. Congratulations! You find out quickly that

babies do two things: they eat and they, er, go through a bunch of diapers.

Taking your first trip to the grocery store, you innocently walk down

the aisle where the baby food and diapers are displayed. What does all

of this have to do with artery-clogging-fat-filled-high cholesterol foods?

See answer in next paragraph.

After you fill

the grocery cart full of diapers and baby food, just turn around and look

at the shelves behind you. The shelves across from the baby products are

stacked with none other than every cookie known to man - how convenient

- especially for the new mom who's trying to lose a couple of extra pounds.

Need additional proof?

If you somehow

resist temptation and make it over to the aisle that carries all of the

diet supplements, you're still not safe. Nope, diet supplements are on

one side of the aisle, and candies on the other. Now you know why you

can never lose weight; they don't want you to.

I told ya.

It's a conspiracy. Still need additional proof?

Just take a

stroll down the cereal aisle and try to find the healthy cereal. It's

all on the top shelf. The sugar-filled-good-tasting cereal is at eye level;

the eye level of your six-year-old, that is. Who out there can say no

to a six-year old? Artery-clogging-fat-filled-high cholesterol sugary

foods aren't just found in the grocery stores though. Nope, what about

those fast food restaurants?

When you drive

up in your car, you speak your order into a box. Then you drive around

to the window, and your order comes in a box. Chances are, if you eat

that artery-clogging-fat-filled-high cholesterol food all the time, soon

one day they'll be laying you to rest in a box. Now, mind you, to be fair,

not all fast food is bad; some of that food is good. The chicken salads

you get at some places are really great and healthy for you. Healthy for

you - not so healthy for the chicken, though. Just be sure to check out

the cholesterol and fat in the dressing before adding it to the salad.

One last thought

as you munch your way through that artery-clogging-fat-filled-high cholesterol

fast food you call lunch. If you must keep slurping that extra large simulated

milk shake, if you can't pry you hands from around that quarter-ton hamburger

with extra cheese, and if eating greasy French fries has become second

nature, then there's still hope for you. Crawford Long Hospital is one

of the top hospitals in the nation for heart surgery and cardiac care

­ and the Varsity is right around the corner. Bon Appetit!

[Rick Ryckeley

is employed by the Fayette County Department of Fire and Emergency Services.

He can be reached at [email protected].]