A specific evil lurks in the

neighborhoods of America like senior citizens at a Picadilly buffet. A

brilliant, sinister conspiracy is afoot. The perpetrators make Kenneth

Lay look like Mr. Rogers. They make the Lindberg kidnapping look like

a plot from an episode of "The Powerpuff Girls." Most people

have fallen victim to crimes by these offenders ... at the drive-thru

window or the walk-up counter.

At McDonald's, Wendy's, Taco

Bell, Burger King or KFC, at 7-11, Quick Trip or Circle K; the sociopaths

stand ready to serve. With scowls on their faces, checkout clerks and

fast-food servers work their intrigue to drive customers insane. The idea

for the first convenience stores and fast-food restaurants was probably

a good one yeah, like the Hindenburg or the name for "Cheez Whiz."

Like most viruses and infections, the idea started harmless enough, but

now has become deadly.

Being forced to wear lame polyester

outfits accented in browns and beiges, what choice do these maniacs have?

Revenge must be foremost on the minds of those found behind the counter

or wearing the Madonna-like radio headset. I am sure we will never be

able to fathom what money handlers across the country must put up with

day after day.

It probably begins with their

training. Imagine a career choice that teaches you how to pack French

fries parallel, wear a paper hat fashionably, or say, "Would you

like a hot apple pie with that?" Thus, fast-food servers and convenience

store clerks really have no other choice but to take it out on us, the

customers.

Remember the first time you

drove off with that little white bag and realized that they forgot your

fries? You probably thought, "What the heck, no big deal." You

were just glad there was a place to buy food cheaply without getting out

of your car. Then it turned into a Dr. Pepper instead of a Coke. Then

waiting in a lengthy, sometimes smelly, line while the clerk chatted to

customer #1 about the brake job they just had while your Dove Bar melted

to ruination. Then a cheeseburger without cheese, a flat Big Gulp it has

become maddening.

What was once a convenience

is now a woeful scourge. Years from now, doctors will discover it was

not liquor or cigarettes or fatty foods that caused heart attacks. It

was slamming the gas nozzle up and down over and over trying to get the

attendant to turn the pump on, or realizing upon entering the highway

that "there's no straw!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

Like so many things in our

modern society, convenience is a term that should be reassessed. Our mental

health is sometimes in the hands of teenagers more interested in the latest

Eminem video than in burgers or Slurpees.

But are the culprits really

the attendants, clerks or servers? Not to join the bandwagon but the blame

again lies with "big business." To turn not just a profit, but

an immense profit, more than a few workers hard workers are being paid

too little. How can someone take pride in their salary of $6.27 an hour?

How can a person really serve the public when they are not truly served

themselves as employees?

Next time any of us are frustrated

in the service we receive, we need to see the big picture, the true situation.

We might not even be the real victim. Next time, consider "them"

the ones who must do the work. After all, we get what we pay for; and

we might just need to pay a little more.