Almost daily

I am reminded of the deep, troubling, life-shaping pain that many people

carry, often times hidden in the buried rooms of their hearts. We're talking

serious pain like...

...the pain

of never hearing your father say, "I love you."

...the pain

of molestation by a trusted parent.

...the pain

of memories of your mother in nightly drunken stupors.

...the pain

of knowing your father beat you with a hoe-handle when you were a ten-year

old boy.

...the pain

of receiving it as good news upon hearing of the death of a parent.

...the pain

of hearing a parent say, "You will never amount to anything in your

life."

...the pain

of an absentee, yet alive, parent.

...the pain

of emotional and physical hurt at the words and hands of a spouse.

...the pain

of finding your child dead after suicide.

As I hear and

see the pain that so many carry around as hated baggage, I stagger at

the sheer force of their human will to keep going. They attend birthday

parties of others knowing full well their own birth was cursed by parents.

They carry on light conversation in the office and even at church when

all the time just below surface there is this huge untreated, unhealed

sore.

In studying

grief-related issues, I once discovered the fact that most people die

with unresolved grief issues. Meaning that most people carry within themselves

for all their lives the pain and suffering associated with the death of

a significant other person. For various issues, the pain of grief was

never addressed and therefore never allowed opportunity to heal.

Is it possible

for healing, in these kinds of circumstances, to take place? We know one

can live after a heart attack. We know one can survive cancer even brain

cancer. We know that pneumonia no longer is the kiss of death, even for

seniors. Modern medicine, I believe a gift from God, has proved it can

heal most any malady. But what about the traumatic wounds of the human

heart that has no medical pathology?

Pride often

times gets in the way of healing. Many men, for example, just can't allow

themselves the therapy to admit to another human being that their daddies

never hugged them much less told them, "I love you." Consequently,

they go through life emotionally crippled and perpetuating the sins and

inadequacies of their own fathers now on their children, passing one generation's

failures onto another and then another ad nauseam.

But there is

hope for every single person who carries within their bosom emotional

garbage. There's hope. Not found in a pill or bottle. Not found on a couch

or in a position. Hope is found in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. That's

why it's called "good news." Gospel means good news.

One day a very

close friend of Jesus Christ died. Jesus grieved deeply over the loss.

After visiting the cemetery where they buried his friend, Jesus directed

the stone to be removed from the tomb. They told Jesus it would stink

upon being removed for the body had been four days dead. Still, they removed

the stone and Jesus cried out, "Lazarus (the name of his friend)

come forth." At that moment Lazarus walked out of the tomb with his

mummy clothes on. Jesus ordered Lazarus to be unbound and let go.

Okay, here's

application. There are some stinking areas of our lives which need to

be opened to the marvelous, healing grace of God. We need to roll away

the stone which keeps our pain and hurt buried. We need to admit to some

caring person perhaps your minister that you need some help unbinding

the "death" clothes which for too long have kept you bound.

I believe with

all my heart that if you will roll away the stone and seek out someone

who cares enough, they will assist you in walking into the brilliant light

of God's grace, forgiveness, and healing love. You don't have to bequeath

your pain to the next generation.

The Rev. Dr. John Hatcher is pastor

of River's Edge

Community Church in Fayetteville.

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