In order to

find out what makes us tick, it is often necessary to look into our ancestry

(looking in our medicine cabinets or under our beds would also help).

When we examine

our roots and the branches of our family tree, we can see what influence

our relatives have had on our lives. Much like the summer when my father

found our crabapple tree riddled with Dutch elm disease, infested with

beetles and dying.

It is easy

to see the impact our close relatives have had on our behavior simply

did our ancestors in other centuries behave and what, if any, impact does

it have on us today?

For instance,

I may have received some of my bizarre sense of humor from my great, great

great grandfather, Alyosius Hezekiah Boylan. Old Al was one of the nation's

first comic strip creators. Unfortunately, he could not draw so he would

write out descriptions of what each panel would look like. His strip,

"Dadburned Children," ran for several years in the Nantucket

News Journal. Our family has kept several of them. Here's an example.

In the first

panel, Father puts his son, Robert, over his knee for talking during supper.

In the second panel, Father paddles Robert. In the third panel, Robert

apologizes and Father says, "I thought I told you not to speak during

dinner. Run outside and get me a new switch."

Al's brother,

Franklin Boylan, looked a little bit like me. In our family journal, he

is described as having a zest for life and a rampant sense of adventure

and curiosity. That could describe me on most days, though I am certain

that I will meet a much different end than Franklin. He died trying to

propel himself to the moon, using a combination of Epsom salt and buckshot.

I didn't get

all of my attributes from my father's side, though. My great, great aunt

on my mother's side, Charlotte Grozny, was a singer during the Roaring

Twenties. Her favorite way to spend the weekend was to sing dirty limericks

in her husband's petting zoo with a megaphone. This obviously connects

with me, as I appreciate a good limerick and am fond of eating the pellets

found at petting zoos.

There are many

relatives that I have never met, due to me not being born yet and them

dying a long time ago. My Great Uncle Petey was a pirate. Well, as much

of a pirate as you could be in Nebraska. He would walk with a pronounced

limp, growl at his neighbors, drink a lot of rum and wear a canary on

his shoulder (parrots were hard to come by).

My great, great,

great, great, grandmother's sister, Ruby, invented a game called Mud Swishing,

in which one would place objects in mud and then mud in one's mouth. The

object of the game was obviously to find the object before swallowing

too much mud or said object.

It is even

said that my family has royalty in its blood. We are allegedly descendants

of The Royal Count Duke Earl King of Hattebury. The count was rumored

to have been a swashbuckling hero who fought in several clashes with the

French in the 15th century. It is said in the book, "European Aristocrats

In The Time Of Plague," that the king frequently wore a mask and

would distract warring soldiers by streaking naked across the battlefield.

This leads

to an interesting family fact. Every generation of our family has had

one member streak across a field of battle. In fact, during the Battle

of Antietam, Daniel Huckaby Boylan, a cousin, was photographed by Matthew

Brady in a photo titled "Naked Bravery." It was part of the

Smithsonian collection until it mysteriously disappeared during the Nixon

Administration.

Examine your

family tree and I am sure you will be amazed at what you find.

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