Monday, Jan.

29, I spoke the following words at the funeral service of my oldest sister,

Alice McGuirt Stow. They may be helpful to others. So I share with you

my readers. Death is a bookkeeper of life. Death balances the books. The

books of our lives. In one clean swoop, death--a good death--cleans all

the books.

Now, Alice

certainly anticipated that I would speak the words at her funeral. Last

Thursday as I began reading Scriptures to her, she said, You are my preacher

and my brother, but first my brother." In no way would Alice want

to be enlarged in her death beyond what she was in life. And in all candor

and forthrightness, most family members have said at one time or another

or wanted to say, "Alice, just shut up." For she did talk.

But death balances

the books. Even though she--as we--had her faults and her flaws, there

are rays of light around death's darkness, reminding us of her good heart,

of her acts of kindnesses, her remembering us at the very time when we

her family wondered if she knew we were alive.

Death balances

the books. Just when we thought that someone had ignored us and slighted

us, the whisper of death's coming begins to balance the books--the books

are reconciled, love restored, and the true worth of one's love revealed.

Someone's last

year, last month of life can--if allowed--be total redemption of a lifetime

of hurt and pain. I'm reminded of the thief of the cross. He had lived

the life of a criminal--truly deserving to be executed, by his own words.

But forgiveness in the last hour changed eternity for him. Forgiveness

in the shadow of death can change the rest of life.

Death balances

the books, for it allows people--most importantly family--to forgive one

another, to try to understand what it must been like to walk a mile in

someone else's moccasins.

Death balances

the books because it reminds us of the good and fun times. Sister Sue,

in her reflection, says she remembers such fun in going to Alice's home.

It was always fun and like a party.

Death, indeed,

is a great balancer of life. But, let's not give death too much credit.

John Donne spoke to death in his classic poem:

"Death,

be not proud, though some have called thee

Mighty and

dreadful, for thou are not so;

For those whom

thou think'st thou dost overthrow

Die not, poor

death, nor yet canst thou kill me...

Thou are slave

to fate, kings, and desperate men

And dost with

poison, war, and sickness dwell;

And poppy and

charms can make us sleep as well

And better

than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?

One short sleep

past, we wake eternally,

And death shall

be no more. Death, thou shalt die."

Rev. Dr. John Hatcher is pastor

of River's Edge

Community Church in Fayetteville.

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