Four kinds

of love (mostly): erotic love (Eros), friendship love

(Philia), family love (Storge), and God's love (Agape).

They are all important. Without Eros, population would

dwindle. As much as we say we love our children and we

do, most children can thank erotic love for their

inception.

Now,

there's nothing wrong with Eros. God made it, too. In

fact, the Bible's Song of Solomon was Barry White stuff

in its day. Eros goes to the depth of our soul.

But what

would we do without friendship love. "Philia"

gives us some of the finest relationships in life.

William Shakespeare counseled us in Hamlet: "Friends

thou hast and their friendship tried, grapple them to

your soul with whoops of steel." Most people will

have only three to five solid, dependable, unshakeable

friends in a lifetime. Hold them dear. The Bible lifts up

the friendship of David and Jonathan, the son of King

Saul. The old adage is so true, "A real friend is

someone who knows everything about you and still is your

friend." I have a handful of such friends and one is

past her 70th birthday (I think).

Family love

(storge) is shared among all families of the planet,

including the animal kingdom. Family love has its quirks,

but it's all about being a member of the family. We can't

point an accusing finger at certain animal kingdom

families and say, "they don't treat one another in

caring ways." Well, there are four indicting fingers

pointing back at us humans. Look at the way we shoot one

another, abandon one another, and even reject one

another.

At its very

best, family love says, "You're loved because you

are a member of the family." My mother-in-law taught

me a giant lesson once. I had failed at one point and

hesitated from telling the family. After telling them all

about it and sharing my fears, my mother-in-law said,

"John, you're family. Everything is okay."

But the

best and brightest love is "agape" love. The

love of God. A couple may have erotic love for one

another, but there will come a day when the Eros has got

up and gone.

Two friends

may have "storge" for one another, but the

friendship may be stretched so far that only

"agape" love can bridge the gulf between the

two.

Family love

may be strong, but the families who are able to

"pray" in the unconditional love of Jesus

Christ have the best chance of surviving. Agape love is

unique to God through Jesus Christ. It's only available

to us through Jesus Christ. It's an experience love as

well as a "solid rock" kind of love. It

flourishes particularly in the hard and difficult times.

It's the love that keeps on giving.

So, enjoy

Valentines Day as much as anyone. Be romantic if that

floats your boat. But the very best kind of love is the

kind that allows you to look into the eyes of your lover,

your friend, or your family member and say, "I mean

it and my life will show it."

The Rev. Dr. John

Hatcher is pastor of River's Edge Community Church in

Fayetteville.

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