In case you

missed it, the second Million Youth March took place last

week in New York. Fifteen-hundred police officers were on

hand to monitor the Million Youth March, although they

could have been assigned to other duties. It seems that

only 2,000 people were present during the Million Youth

March. In 1998, there were 6,000 on hand for the first

Million Youth March.

Am I missing something

here? How can you have a Million Youth March with only

2,000 or 6,000 people on hand? I mean, don't you need at

least a million youth to have a Million Youth March?

Apparently not. After all,

during the Million Man March on Washington, D. C. a few

years ago, government estimates of the attendance were

anywhere from 400,000 to 800,000 in attendance. An

impressive number, to be sure, but still 200,000 to

600,000 shy of a million. Yet, the media insists on

referring to the event as the Million Man March.

A few years ago, when I was

an associate pastor out West, a former pastor of the

church I served claimed that, when he was the pastor,

attendance at the church would "exceed 5,000 on many

occasions." The former pastor was returning for a

special service and I was in charge of the publicity.

When I read his press release about the 5,000 who

attended the church under his reign, I decided, before I

wrote the news release, to go into the sanctuary and

count the seats. With the assistance of the youth pastor,

I counted every seat in the sanctuary several times.

No matter how many times we

counted, we could come up with no more than 984 seats.

Even if every seat was filled and a few chairs were

brought in, the church would have had to have five

services on Sunday, each packed to the walls, to get the

5,000 worshippers. Not very likely.

Smugly, I reported my

findings to the rest of the church staff. The longtime

members of the staff who had served under this pastor

were outraged! Not at him, but at me!

They all insisted that

there had been many Sundays when attendance had exceeded

5,000. No amount of argument, persuasion, or logic would

move them from their entrenched position. They preferred

to believe in the "5,000-member days" that had

never existed, save on the pastor's reporting forms.

Myths die hard, especially

when people really want to believe the myths. When the

desire for myth prevails, the truth is irrelevant and

even downright pesky.

Once in awhile, someone

will speak with great passion about the U. S.

Constitution's principle of "separation of church

and state." It's a myth, of course, and never

mentioned in the Constitution.

Then there's the myth about

Proctor and Gamble being involved in satanism. The myth

even claims that the president of the company allegedly

appeared on a national talk show and admitted to the

satanic involvement. It never happened.

Remember the myth about

Madalyn Murray O'Hair trying to get the FCC to take

Christian programming off the air? Again, never happened.

Yet, petitions continue to circulate and obtain millions

of signatures about events that never occurred.

Well, since accuracy

doesn't matter anymore, I've decided to take advantage of

the situation. This Sunday, our church will celebrate its

anniversary. We began three years ago with 19 people and

our high attendance was on Easter of this year with 165

in attendance. Not a bad growth pattern by most

standards!

However, I am formally

changing the name of the upcoming service. From

henceforth, this coming Sunday will not be known as the

Third Anniversary Service. From now on, Sept. 12, 1999,

will be known in the church archives as "10,000 in

Attendance Sunday!"

In a few months, we will

look back on this date and say, "Wow, wasn't that

`10,000 in Attendance Sunday' really something?" In

a couple of years, we will ask people, "Were you

there when the church celebrated "10,000 in

Attendance Sunday?" With the passing of time, people

will remember "10,000 in Attendance Sunday"

with fondness and longing.

Perhaps, they will even

speak of the great crowds and the excitement generated by

all those people. We will write the history of the

church, being sure to mention that, by the third year, we

were celebrating "10,000 in Attendance Sunday."

If we say it loud enough

and long enough, the story may be picked up by the

religious or the secular press. Why, we could become

famous throughout the world as the church who, in just

three short years, grew from 19 people to a congregation

celebrating "10,000 in Attendance Sunday!"

I bet we can pull it off,

too, if we just repeat it enough! As least, as long as

nobody thinks to count the seats. [Father David Epps is

rector at Christ the King Charismatic Episcopal Church.

He may be reached online at [email protected] or at P. O. Box 2192, Peachtree

City, GA 30269. Even now, he is planning the "50,000

in Attendance Sunday" for the fourth anniversary of

the church.]