Seems like everything old

is new again these days. Still, times are changing.

If you don't believe me ask

your your 7- or 11-year-old, or your teenager. They will

let you know things are different now than in your day.

They may be right about

many things, but one thing remains the same. Raising kids

can be a challenge and discipline is a must. Note, I said

discipline, not punishment. One and the same? Absolutely

not. Punishment is easy. Discipline is not.

So, you are confused about

discipline? I was, too. Still am at times. Do you yell

more, but receive less cooperation from your children? Do

you have to become angry before you can inspire your

children to behave? I know where you are coming from.

Been there more times than I can remember.

I may have found the book

for you. Wish I had had access to "How To Behave So

Your Children Will, Too" 20 years ago.

The book shows us how to

get our children to listen... the first time. It teaches

strategies for dealing with negative attention,

arguments, power struggles and manipulation. We are shown

how to promote self-discipline and responsible

decision-making. It shows us what successful parents do

to help their children behave and feel good about

themselves.

"Parents need to

understand that their children's behavior is often a

reflection of their own behavior. That's what makes this

book unique. It does not focus on what children do wrong.

It teaches parents what they can do differently,"

says author Sal Severe, Ph.D.

Dr. Severe has three

children who consume much of his energy and time, and

provide him with his greatest blessing and achievement.

There are other achievements however. He has been a

school psychologist for 22 years. He has concentrated his

practice on children and adolescents with emotional and

behavioral disorders and their families. He also has

worked as a teacher, counselor, principal and director of

special education. He provides field supervision for

school psychology internships for Arizona State

University and Northern Arizona University. He has

conducted training for the Arizona Department of

Education and the Arizona Department of Corrections.

Dr. Severe is currently the

clinical director of Flor del Sol alternative school in

the Cartwright School District in Phoenix, Ariz., where

he is also the chairperson of the Psychological Services

Department. In the past 18 years, he has conducted more

than 600 workshops across the United States. He has

become known for his work with schools, churches and

parent organizations, including the National Head Start

Association, the Council for Exceptional Children, Tough

Love, the Hemophilia Association and Phoenix Children's

Hospital. Dr. Severe has provided training for the Intel

Corporation, General Motors, SONY, Motorola, Honeywell,

Texas Instruments, Pizza Hut, NAPA, Federal Express and

Transamerica Occidental.

Still wondering if his book

is for you? Take this test to determine if you need to

read "How To Behave So Your Children Will,

Too."

- Are you tired of

repeating everything four times to get your children to

listen?

- Do you get an argument

from your son every time you ask him to do anything?

- Do you have to get angry

to get your childen to obey?

- Do you give in to your

children to stop the whining and teasing?

- Do you say, "Stop

that" or "That's enough" more than six

time a day?

- Does your baby-sitter

give you a discount for coming home early?

- Do your children spend

hours in front of the TV and only minutes doing homework?

- Do you ever feel guilty

because your children don't behave?

- Do you and your spouse

argue about discipline?

- When you punish your

children, do you feel punished yourself?

- Do you hope the next ten

years pass as quickly as possible?

If you answered

"yes" to any of these questions, the book may

help save your sanity. "How To Behave So Your

Children Will, Too" can teach you how to teach your

children to behave, to listen - the first time, to

be more cooperative.

Parenting requires

countless sacrifices and continuous hard work, but the

rewards are plenty. To be successful parents, Dr. Sal

offers these tips:

1. Welcome change in

yourself and your children. See change as positive. Seek

self-improvement.

2. Possess good judgment.

Know the difference between mischief and misconduct.

3. Have a sense of humor

about raising children.

4. Believe that discipline

is a teaching process. It is not simply punishment.

Discipline is everything you do to teach children to be

responsible and think for themselves.

5. Focus on the positive

attitudes and behavior in their children. Call attention

to positive qualities.

6. Use self-esteem as

motivation. "You made a good choice. You should be

proud of yourself."

7. Behave yourself. Provide

good example by being responsible, not perfect.

8. Behave consistently. Say

what you mean and mean what you say. Follow through. Do

not give in to misbehavior demands.

9. Behave proactively.

Anticipate problems and plan to avoid them.

10. Use punishments that

teach better decision-making.

11. Stay calm when your

button is being pushed. Understand that anger gets in the

way and makes conflicts worse.

12. Have patience for the

time it takes to see change in yourself and your

children.

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