Ask Margar-etiquette about Masking for the Fall Season

Dear Margar-etiquette,

Fall allergy season is here, and I have started wearing a mask again in crowded indoor spaces. I want to reduce my exposure to flu and COVID, but I also suffer from seasonal allergies. If I am sneezing or coughing, I figure wearing a mask may make the people around me a little more comfortable, too.

What surprises me is how many people seem bothered by my mask. I get looks, questions, and occasionally comments about why I am wearing it. I’m not asking anyone else to put on a mask. I am simply doing what makes me feel more comfortable during cold, flu, COVID, and allergy season. Why does this seem to require an explanation?

Mind Your Mask

Dear Mind Your Mask,

Autumn generally comes with cooler temperatures, changing leaves, football, pumpkin everything, and the annual game of “Is That Allergies or Are You Sick?”

The sniffles and sneezes of allergy season can certainly make people wonder. Add cold, flu, and COVID season to the mix, and it’s understandable that some people choose to take extra precautions.

But the etiquette question is pretty simple: Why should your decision to wear a mask require anyone else’s approval?

The stranger sitting next to you doesn’t know whether your sneezing is caused by ragweed or something contagious. You’re making a personal choice about your own health and comfort, while also being considerate of others.

A few things to remember:

1. Be considerate when you’re coughing or sneezing.
Whether it’s allergies or illness, cover your coughs and sneezes with your elbow, wash your hands, and give people a little space when possible. Wearing a mask is another option someone may choose.

2. A mask isn’t an invitation for commentary.
“You know you don’t have to wear that, right?” puts someone in the position of explaining a personal decision that doesn’t affect you. Unless there’s a genuine reason you need to know, let it be.

3. You don’t know why someone is wearing a mask.
They may be trying to avoid getting sick, protecting someone they love, experiencing symptoms themselves, or simply feeling more comfortable wearing one. None of those reasons requires an explanation to a stranger.

4. Don’t assume every sniffle means someone is contagious.
Seasonal allergies can cause plenty of sneezing, coughing, and congestion. We don’t need to recoil from everyone who reaches for a tissue. A little awareness and a bit grace can coexist.

So, wear your mask if that’s what makes sense for you. You don’t owe the checkout person, the passenger beside you on the airplane, or the stranger in the elevator an explanation. And if someone asks why you’re wearing it? A pleasant, “I’m just being cautious,” is more than enough.

We don’t have to understand or make the same personal choices as others in order to respect them. Sometimes good manners simply means knowing when something really isn’t any of our business.

With love and good manners,

Margar-etiquette