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To get a room full of 4th and 5th graders to agree on anything nowadays might seem like an impossibility. But Dear Reader, I can report that last Friday afternoon at 2:30 p.m., the impossible happened. I should know. I was there for all of it.
What was agreed upon, you may ask?
Across the board, with no debate or hesitation, they came to a unanimous decision: It is completely unreasonable for parents to ask their children to do chores. Yes, I know. I couldn’t believe it either.
But there’s more. Much more.
It all started during our writing club meeting. I mentioned that when I got home, I’d probably spend three or four hours on the computer writing. I asked one of the students what she was going to do when she got home.
She said, “I guess I’ll do my homework, and my mom makes me clean my room.”
I kept a straight face.
“Well,” I said, “who made the mess in your room?”
She looked at me like the answer was obvious.
“I did.”
“Oh, okay.”
Next up, a young man chimed in.
“I have to do chores too.”
“Oh, really?” I said. “What kind?”
“Not only do I have to clean my room, but I have to wash the dishes!”
I nodded, “And who dirtied your room?”
“I did.”
“And who dirtied the dishes?”
“I did.”
“So, it’s unfair to clean your room and wash dishes that you made dirty?”
“Yes, it is.”
“Oh, OK.”
Then another student, not to be outdone, jumped in.
“I don’t just have two chores. I have five!”
She proudly listed them: clean my room, do the dishes, do the laundry, take out the trash, and sweep the floor.
“Oh, OK.”
From the back of the room came a voice determined to win this competition.
“I have ten chores!”
“Ten?”
He started listing them: cleaning his room, taking out the garbage, sweeping floors, doing dishes, vacuuming, taking care of the dog, and several more. Then he added, “I also have to do my own laundry.”
I leaned in. “What does that mean?”
“I have to pick up my clothes and put them in the laundry basket and take them to the laundry room.”
“Who runs the washer?”
“My mom.”
“Who runs the dryer?”
“My mom.”
“Who folds the clothes and puts them away?”
“My mom.”
“But you do the laundry?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, OK.”
Finally, a quiet voice from the middle of the room. “I have chores too.”
“What do you do?”
She answered, “I take my dog for a walk every day. And I feed him and give him water and clean up after him.”
I nodded. “Whose dog is it?”
“Mine.”
“Oh, OK.”
The meeting ended shortly after that. I didn’t say a word about how parents work all day then come home and start their second jobs.
Their real jobs.
Being a mom. Being a dad.
I decided to let them enjoy their version of reality just a little while longer. Because in about seven or eight years, they’ll be out in the real world. And they’ll learn soon enough.
When you come home from work, that’s when the work really begins.
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