I have always

avoided formal discussions of religious issues in this column and leave

those issues for the columnists in the religion section. I have my own

religious beliefs, but the purpose of my column is family and children's

issues.

Yet there are

religious issues that pertain to a child's development that I want to

address in this week's column. My purpose is not to suppose that psychological

and sociological issues are the only goals of religious involvement. Every

faith has its own views of spirituality, sin, afterlife, judgment, and

so forth, but my purpose here is to address the psychological and social

benefits of a religious upbringing.

First of all,

involvement in a religious body provides social interaction for children

of all ages. For preschool aged children, the church or synagogue may

be the only place they interact with other children of the same age. They

learn to develop friendships, share toys, and interact in a group setting.

If the child is not in day care or preschool, this interaction helps to

prepare them socially for their school years.

With older

children and teens, parents can have a high level of confidence that their

children are engaging in productive and safe behaviors when they are with

their youth group or other church groups. Church camp, social activities,

and missions trips are organized to allow these children to interact in

an environment that is clean, safe, and productive physically, spiritually,

and psychologically.

Religious involvement

provides safe environment for socialization. Whether on an outing at an

amusement park or serving on some missions project, the child is with

a responsible adult who is concerned about the child's well being both

physically and spiritually. Of course, we have all heard stories of youth

ministers and priests who have molested children, but such incidents are

relatively rare and certainly not any more frequent than other professionals

who work with children such as coaches and teachers.

Religious involvement

teaches morality. I doubt that there are any two people on the planet

that have perfectly identical views on morality, but what is common among

religious teachings is that most religions encourage productive behaviors

and discourage unproductive ones.

Problematic

or risky behaviors like drinking, sexual promiscuity, and dishonesty are

less likely among children who grow up in religious homes than in those

where no religious teachings are encouraged. Teens who are active in their

churches are less likely to steal, lie, become pregnant or to use illegal

substances than teens who are not active in any church.

Finally, religious

involvement teaches altruism. Altruism is selfless investment in the needs

of others.

People are

naturally selfish and egocentric. We start life believing that everything

about the world exists for our benefit. Some people never recover from

this infantile handicap. Selfishness, in fact, is at the root of most

interpersonal problems at home, school, and work.

Most religions

teach that there is something greater than oneself and that giving of

self is an important part of maturation. This benefit is long-lasting.

Religious individuals are more likely to be satisfied with their jobs,

friendships, and family, their marriages last longer, and they report

greater satisfaction with their partners than do people who are uninvolved

with any religion.

If you have

children and are uninvolved with any religion, but are considering religious

involvement, I suggest you look for a religious body that has an active

youth program.

Children tend

to maintain their religious teachings into their adult years, even if

they slip away during late adolescence or early adulthood. Children who

are not raised in any religious body are unlikely to pursue religion in

their adult years.

Therefore,

a church or synagogue that invests in its youth is planning for its own

future as well as the future of the children they are shepherding.

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