Continued

from last week...

Shortly

before Christmas, I referred a distantly related

correspondent to another far-removed cousin I had swapped

data with, but had never met.

She

forwarded to me the letter she got back: "Gloria, I

regret to inform you that Donald passed away on April

23rd, 1999. I really don't know anything about his

research, but will put your message in a folder that I

hope to get to someday to try to help out people such as

yourself. My problem is that he had so many PAF [Personal

Ancestral File] folders that I have difficulty finding

any one particular line. Happy holidays.

"Beth

Spidell"

Stunned, I

wrote at once: "Dear Beth Spidell,

"(I

don't want to assume you are Mrs. Donald, but I suspect

you are.) Gloria P__ wrote you, at my suggestion, and

then relayed to me your message concerning Don's death. I

am so very sorry. Your husband very kindly sent me

genealogical information several times between summer of

1997 and spring of 1998, after seeing a posting I placed

on a Web site. In just a few short messages, he made me

feel like family (cousins!) and connected a few other

researchers with me and I with them.

"His

documentation was meticulous and his sense of humor

delightful. I'm sure you heard his `Wise and Wonderful'

joke. Once, in apologizing for not responding quickly, he

alluded to an incident concerning moving, a Jeep

Cherokee, and a 5 1/2 foot rattlesnake! I never did hear

the stories, but I bet they were startling.

"I

hope he was not ill long - I can't even guess his

age - and that he had the full life that his

correspondence implied. Please accept the heartfelt

condolences of one whose life is diminished by the

passing of a man she never even met."

She wrote

back quickly, giving me a clue that Don was a physician:

"Dear Sallie,

"Yes,

I am his wife - we almost made it to 35 years (that

was the day of the funeral). Don got sick January 30th

and died April 23rd. He had acute pancreatitis, plus

double pneumonia which set in within a few days of

hospitalization. He seemed to be getting better and went

back to work March 31st and died at work.

"As

you said, he had a marvelous sense of humor, and I was

told he literally died laughing. He had this little

teasing he did with the nurses by startling them with

slapping a patient's record down on the counter and

turning away with a `hee, hee, hee.'

"Well,

that is exactly what he did and then went down. He died

immediately from a very large pulmonary embolism.

"He

was only 56 years old.

"We

did have some excitement in our lives - sometimes

more than I thought I could stand! The Jeep Cherokee

incident involved rolling it at 75 mph on the Interstate

when we blew a tire and causing a 4"X1" swath

of his hair to be cut to 1/4" - so he was

`scalped by a Cherokee!'

"We

moved into our new home shortly after that incident, and

soon thereafter we had the episode of the 5 1/2' snake.

Now that was some major excitement as it was the biggest

one I'd ever seen! I still have the skin.

"He

was a wonderful man, not without faults, but none so bad

they couldn't be overlooked. And I appreciate that he

told others about our life and was so helpful to them

with their research. He was never happier than when he

`met' more family on the Internet or by mail. During his

illness he found out just how many people loved him, and

he was surprised at their great numbers. The chapel was

full to overflowing and the flowers were many; more than

he would have ever thought.

"You

would appreciate that we laid him to rest in a `Don-type'

cemetery - down a long, narrow country lane, shaded

mesa with a view of the mountains and the valley. The

other `inhabitants' are of old pioneer stock and some of

the most revered families in the Gila Valley. Some of the

graves are just mounds of stone, some are edged with

concrete, some are fenced in and some are completely

covered with concrete (were their families afraid they

might get out?)

"We

used to `do' that kind of out-of-the-way cemetery in our

quest for information. And I think he must have had a

good laugh because he was laid to rest with full military

honors and 21-gun salute. He had been an officer in the

U.S. Army, and they `allowed' him to retire with some

really snide remarks on his final officer's efficiency

report - something about how he should not be

allowed to be around soldiers and having to be totally

supervised at all times! We used to get it out and have a

good laugh.

"Thank

you for your kind words and memories of his online

contact with you. I appreciate knowing how many people he

helped.

"May

your holidays be happy ones and your research successful

beyond your wildest dreams.

"Beth

Spidell" WJC65739.

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