It's Monday

morning, Jan. 3, 2000. It is the first "work

day" of this century and my computer is working just

beautifully.

In

preparation for the new century, we had bought several

jugs of water, and caught up lots of water in barrels and

other containers. We try to keep bread and canned goods

in the house. There's a smoker on the back porch and a

couple of lanterns in the garage. Living as far out in

the country as we do, we try not to let our gas tanks get

too low.

Most of the

above is ordinary winter preparedness for us, but I

suppose we had done some degree of preparation for

possible Y2K problems.

One thing

we did not do to prepare for the transition from the 20th

to the 21st century is read any of the doom's day

materials in the print media, or tune in to any of the

television or radio programs where we were promised that

doom and gloom would be the topic of the day.

Life's too

short, and though I often complain that my faith is not

what I want - and think I need - it to be,

times like these remind me it is more than enough.

My faith is

built on a rock. A rock that will stand.

Do you

remember Matthew's account of the conversation between

Jesus and Peter about faith. Recall how Jesus had asked

his followers, "Who do people say the son of man

is?"

They had

answered with various opinions from the crowd. Then he

said to them, "Who do you say I am?

That's what

it always comes down to, you know. We can't ride the

winds of public opinion forever. Sooner or later we have

to know some things for ourselves.

Peter

replied to that timeless question asked by the future

messiah and savior of the world, "Thou are the

Christ, the son of the Living God."

That's

about as cool as it gets. Yesterday, today and forever.

That is the answer to the most important question I have

ever asked myself.

Who was and

is Jesus?

There's

never been a harder question for me to answer. I grew up

with opinions about Jesus being household conversation. I

had Jesus spoon-fed to me, and shoved down my throat from

the cradle. I was both curious and resentful. I cared

enough to want to know more, but I wanted to know it for

myself. I trusted no one's opinions, or promises,

concerning Jesus Christ.

So fed up

was I of all the contradictions I saw and heard that I

decided at 18 years old to just write Jesus out of my

quest for faith. Then a gay friend of mine reminded me

that it wasn't just the Bible that spoke of Jesus.

Appeared he was doing a lot of searching of his own, and

was a little bit ahead of me at the time. "Much

historical data supports those biblical stories," he

said.

"If

you are looking for truth, then you have to be realistic.

You can't deny what you don't understand. You just have

to pray and search and wait for understanding." That

was his advice. It was good advice at that time. It is

good advice today.

I was

baptized again when I was 23 to try to wash away all the

guilt I felt over trying to deny the reality of Jesus.

But the baptism didn't help. No more than it had when I

was 16 and wanted so desperately to believe.

No, it took

something more. It took seeing unconditional love in

action before I believed. Once I saw that, and recognized

its source, all doubts dissipated. Instantly. And I

believed.

I knew with

Peter of 200 centuries ago that Jesus was the Christ, the

Son of the Living God. I began to read the recorded words

of Jesus with a different outlook. He and all that he

stood for became real to me.

I believe

him when he said, "...Be on the alert, for you do

not know when you Lord is coming."

I believe

he meant it when he said we should not worry about

tomorrow, but live one day a time.

Does that

mean we should not plan or prepare for tomorrow? Shucks,

no! Only a fool could live in this world and observe even

a little bit of nature and think we should not plan for

tomorrow. But we must live today. And when planning and

preparing for tomorrow prevents us from living today,

something is wrong, as in way out of balance.

Happy New

Year to all of you and God bless you in your personal

searches. May the answers you seek come in due time.